Saturday, February 16, 2013

How can you connect God with Life Insurance?

Most life insurance policies have a number of exclusionary statements regarding circumstances under which they aren't going to pay out;  Like if you die, or whatever... In just about every policy you will see the policy will not pay beneficiaries if the death was due to "an act of War or God."  An act of God?  What does that mean?
Well, the best open ended definition I could find was, "An event that directly and exclusively results from the occurrence of natural causes that could not have been prevented by the exercise of foresight or caution; an inevitable accident." Really? What if there is no God? Then do my kids get paid when I get caught near an eruption and torched alive in molten lava while vacationing in Hawaii? What if the Gov't is using HAARP to manipulate the weather? Does my family get paid then? When Chaney and old man Bush are getting crushed playing poker with some Palestinians and have to send a massive storm to lay waste to Israel. Meanwhile, I'm IN Israel, celebrating the death of Christ and killing Christian babies. Suddenly hail starts to fall from the sky. As the hail's intensity grows, so does the size of the hail stones. OUCH!!! Then my skull is split in half by a stone the size of a softball and I die. Are Leo and Ahlia millionaires? Or has the Gov't just screwed them AGAIN? Or, Ooops! Tsunami! 100,000 Die! Thousands of refugees and orphans. Buuuuuut, conveniently, no payouts! Sorry people. Suck my dick. An Act of God. ...Don't you mean Lord God? Oh, nevermind.

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